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The Oracle

How can I manage a successful career in law and having a family?

updated on 12 December 2023

Dear Oracle

I plan on becoming a lawyer but I also have a family – will I have time to see my children?

The Oracle replies

Reading time: six minutes

Striking a work/life balance is a common concern for many aspiring lawyers and rightly so – the legal field is known for its intense and unstructured working hours. Lawyers, however, can and do have children; the key is to find a law firm/chambers that works for you.

Being a successful lawyer means putting the time in and proving your dedication, but that doesn’t mean giving up your entire life to your career. If you’re raising a family, as with many things in life, planning ahead and researching will be fundamental to your success.

Find a firm that supports flexibility

Finding the right firm that supports both your career aspirations and family commitments is the first port of call. What are the maternity and paternity leave benefits like? How much flexibility are you offered when it comes to school holidays, children being off sick or parents’ evening commitments? These are all questions you should be asking whenever you get the chance to meet representatives from law firms.

Find out about law firm open days and insight schemes in 2023/24 in this Feature.

With a busy schedule it can be difficult to attend open days and firm events. However, there are a number of virtual events on offer that make accessing insights into the profession that little bit easier for working parents. Make the most of these events by ensuring you’re prepared and armed with relevant and interesting questions and speaking to as many people as you can.

Take a look to see what virtual and in-person events are coming up on LCN’s Events page.

Part of this research involves looking into a firm’s culture. It’s important to assess whether the firm will be the right fit for you and identify what kind of flexibility and family schemes it offers. Independent charity Working Families recently listed the 2023 top 30 employers for working families in which Pinsent Masons LLP featured in the top 10 for the seventh year running, alongside the Crown Prosecution Service, so these employers may be worth consideration. Other law firms to feature in the top 30 list included Allen & Overy LLP, DWF Group Plc and Hill Dickinson LLP, to name a few.

Maternity leave is also crucial to consider when planning for a family. In May, Clyde & Co LLP launched a new parental leave policy, offering all partners and employees at the firm, who have 12 months’ service, 26 weeks of fully paid leave, regardless of gender or parental role. The firm also allows five days of emergency leave a year and access to backup childcare provision. Other firms also have a range of maternity policies – for example, Latham & Watkins, employees get up to 40 weeks of enhanced pay for maternity.

You’ll likely have other criteria that are important when choosing the right employer for you, including salary, types of client, size of firm and location – so don’t forget to factor these into your decision making as well.

Find out more about how to research a firm with this Feature.

If you’re clear from the beginning on what your career goals are, and how you plan to fit these around raising a family, you should be able to make the necessary preparations both at work, with an employer who cares and supports you, and at home.

What are your priorities?

That being said, if your goal is to make partner at a magic circle firm or take silk as a barrister, you’ll need to make some tough choices about where you’re willing to compromise. The hard truth is that being a lawyer and a parent is a challenge. If you’re committed to doing both equally, you might wish to consider working at a regional firm where there’s greater work flexibility or acting as an in-house counsel in the private or public sector. For barristers, this may mean working for the government, armed forces or commercial companies. Although this might mean a decrease in earnings, it’ll mean a regular income and guaranteed time at home with your family.

Being a working parent is a balancing act, with the way you chose to split your time ultimately coming down to personal choice and the flexibility of your employer. Setting clear, manageable priorities will allow you to make the most of both your career and your family life.

It’s also natural for your priorities to change as your career progresses. For example, if you’re a university student currently looking for a training contract and don’t yet have children, parental leave might not be a factor at the top of your list. As time goes on, however, what you want from an employer might shift. For candidates planning to have children, it’s completely normal to reassess your job, or firm, when the time comes – and if you need to move firms to one that suits your newfound priorities better, do so.

You don’t have to plan everything and life doesn’t always go according to plan, but it’s good to do your research and have an idea of what matters to you.

How to prioritise as a working parent

One of the first steps to successfully managing life as a working parent is determining not only what your priorities are, but also what matters to your family.

Identifying the difference between urgent and important tasks is an effective way to manage your priorities as a working parent. Urgent tasks might consist of responding to client emails, completing deadlines and getting your children to school on time. Important tasks on the other hand are ones that truly matter to you either as a parent or for the development of your career.

For instance, if you’re working on a long-winded case that you know could impact an upcoming appraisal it’s crucial you allocate time to do thorough due diligence despite it not being urgent. Another task that might be important to you is ensuring your whole family has dinner together. Consider making a list of weekly tasks and labelling them as either ‘urgent’, ‘important’, ‘necessary’ or ‘extra’. ‘Necessary’ tasks might include making your children’s dinner or doing the laundry, while ‘extra’ might be attending work drinks or taking your children to an extracurricular activity.

The final piece of advice to all those wishing to balance the demands of being a parent and a lawyer is this: it’s ok to say no. You physically can’t do it all and being a parent is in itself a full-time job, so when you add to that working in one of the most demanding industries, it’s inevitable that sometimes something will have to give.

Ask your colleagues for help when you need it, be realistic with your clients on what they can expect and talk to your partner, family or friends about the demands of your week. Some periods will be busier than others and sometimes it’s simply not feasible to manage it all alone. It’s far better to be honest about what you have the capacity to do than to set yourself up for failure. 

You can do it

You can be a parent, and you can be a successful lawyer. You just need to carefully think about your priorities and how you want to make the balance work for you and your family.